I met with a "professional" to discuss Alyssa and Evan and some of my concerns about them entering an "all-white" school. My concerns about how the school will handle the issue of race as well as their adoption. This professional assured me that she loved with her heart and didn't see color. Really? Because it's OKAY for you to see Alyssa and Evan as Chinese! How insulting (and racist??) to think the acceptable answer to racism is to be color blind. I want people to acknowledge, accept and embrace the fact that Alyssa and Evan are Chinese. I want Alyssa and Evan to grow up PROUD of being Chinese and being confident in who they are and where they came from.
Seriously....
Do we want to deny this beautiful girl her heritage by pretending she's white?
Or take away this handsome little fellow's first 5 years of life trying to pretend he is only Canadian and his life in China meant nothing?
***Added later....my husband thinks I'm over analyzing what people mean when they say they are "color blind". He thinks they are just trying to say that they accept and love our kids and it doesn't matter to them what race they are. I still think it's important for people to understand what their words convey to people of race. But, I promise to nicely and calmly educate people who may tell me they are "color blind".***
3 comments:
When I meet people of other colours, race, etc. I don't pretend I don't see it. On the contrary I ask questions because I am geniunely interested. I love learning about the differences of traditions, foods, etc. It would be a very plain world if we were all the same.
I think people are possibly answering your questions how they perceive to be politically correct. They probably don't even realize that they are offending you. They think it is the right answer to give, unfortunately.
Hey Tammy!
I think I agree with the second Anonymous commenter. We get the same thing here unfortunately, and its even in our own family. Most people think that's what you want to hear and that its the 'safest' answer to just say they don't notice colour. Its also a good way for them to just be ignorant and not put forth the effort to learn anything about the culture either. The WORST is when this happens in your own family. These people have the best of intentions and think they are saying what we want to hear, but obviously aren't nearly as educated or sensitive when it comes to race and adoption as all of us are.
Anyway, in the short time I've dealt with this I've come to realize that nobody cares nearly as much about this stuff as us Mamas. They are our kids and I think its just natural to step into the Mama Bear mode when it comes to this kind of stuff. If putting your kids into a non-culturally diverse school is the only option you have, than it is what it is. Your kids have a wonderful family life and parents who do a wonderful job with cultural education, and that's more than a lot of kids have. They've also got a sibling who is from China at home - how cool is that! :-)
Thinking about your family and hoping for some news!!!!
--Danielle
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