The little child I spoke of a few posts ago is constantly on my mind. It's strange to be pursuing an adoption, yet we are not really officially "adopting". I can't go around sharing where we are in the process (we aren't anywhere in the process) yet this child is on all our hearts (our children know about this child).
I can say we are actively pursuing this particular child. We are adamant this child deserves us to push, advocate, inquire, ask questions, pray for, love. I was thinking today what lengths we (people in general, not just us) will go to bring a child home. At this point, Chris and I could start our next adoption - officially. It's been 10 months since we adopted Evan so we are now far enough along to update our homestudy, choose a country and get on board the adoption roller coaster. But, we are so adamant in our pursuit of this particular child that we will not start another "official" adoption. How far, how long will we continue to pursue? Honestly, until we are left with absoutely no options to adopt this child. As I mentioned earlier, May is a big month as this is when (hopefully!) decisions might be made in regards to the child's "adoptability".
I wish I could share a bit of what this journey has been like for me, someday I hope I can write it all out. It's hard not to share adoption news or to share when there isn't any. It's hard to not seem too eager, too desperate but yet put enough pressure to get things started. It's so hard to not be able to communicate with this child, to let he/she know how much he/she is already loved & cherished, how much we are all advocating for his/her life.
I keep listening to the song "Gotta Be Somebody" by Nickelback - I know this child feels exactly what this song is saying...I wish I could let him/her know we are their "Somebody". Please, please pray for the court date in May.
'Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's gotta be somebody for me like that
'Cause nobody wants to do it on their own
And everyone wants to know their not alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be someone for me out there
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1 comment:
Tammy, I am praying for you. I read your comments on the earlier post and have already been holding you guys up. May is coming soon now... Your prayer child (meaning whether in actuality or as a much loved and prayed for child) *is* worth the devotion you are committing to him or her. I'm so glad to "know" people like you.
Shelley in BC
P.S. Thanks for your well-wishes on the e-group. :)
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